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The Clone Wars

When I was a child, my mom would make my sisters and me matching clothes. Sometimes we were lucky enough to get different colors (I got yellow to my sisters’ red and blue) but our outfits always shared the same style or at least the same theme (e.g. pinstriped velvet overalls — they got skirts, I got pants).

Fast forward 20 years and it shouldn’t take a shrink to explain why my greatest fashion fear is to be seen in the same outfit as someone else. Sure, everyone thinks that it’s an embarrassing faux pas to be someone’s twin — whether it’s at work, where you’ve got to try to avoid crossing paths with the person for a whole day, or at a big, public event like a wedding (I suppose being in a matching dress as a bridesmaid is an agony in and of itself, but as a guest it’s particularly bad). But even a pair of shoes — in a different color — or a piece of jewelry could send me into a tizzy. So short of going home to change, or always having a whole backup outfit in the office in case of an emergency, there are a few things to keep in mind in order to minimize the chances of designer doppelgangery.

  • Rule #1: Resist the urge to buy the exact “it” item of the season. That is, you can still get the status item, just not the version that’s in all the ads in the September mags — try a different color or a get the skirt instead of the dress. It’s a challenge, but trust me, it’s worth the trouble.
  • Rule #2: Discover a great off-the-radar designer and keep his/her name and number top secret; if anyone asks where you got an item, keep it vague: “Oh, I just got it at some shop…”
  • Rule #3: If you and a friend absolutely must have the same item, you gotta work out a schedule! You get the odd days, she gets the evens…
  • Rule #3b: If it’s not a friend who’s got the same item, and all else fails, wait till she wears the item, then wear it three days later!
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  • 4 Responses to “The Clone Wars”

    1. class factotum
      September 8th, 2005 10:30
      1

      Oh honey I SO feel your pain! My mother did the same thing to my sister and me! How about ratcheting the trauma up a bit by making me the not-so-cute older sister? I had the stick-straight hair and was chubby. SHE had long, curly golden locks down to her butt, plump rosy cheeks and and angelic smile. We would walk down the streets of Madrid (my dad was in the military) and total strangers would stop us to coo over her beauty.

      “Que cute!” they would exclaim over her four-year-old innocent charm as I would seethe with second-grade jealousy.

      Yet my mother would persist in making us adorable matching outfits as if that would make as adorably matching cute.

      Yes, I am still scarred. But at least I not longer wish her dead.

    2. class factotum
      September 8th, 2005 10:32
      2

      No longer. NO longer wish her dead.

    3. meyen
      September 8th, 2005 21:39
      3

      i have a problem with rule #3b, the thing of it is, if you let her wear the item first, it would seem that you went thru her laundry. so if i may, i think that one should just avoid the mainstream! if the item hits the mainstream, clear away from it! its really hard, but its worth it! trust me! when ppl start wearing what you wore a week or two weeks ago, it will seem like THEY went thru ur laundry! and then everybody’s happy (smile)!

    4. Alex
      September 9th, 2005 00:49
      4

      As much as I hated being my middle sister’s Mini Me, I find myself all these years later her fashion twin. Though we live on opposite coasts, we often end up buying the same items, sometimes (weirdly, like twin-language weird, and we’re not twins) completely independently of each another, but more often than not because we tip each other off, of our own volition! I guess now that we aren’t in the same city, we can both afford to be generous with our fashion finds… Or I suppose you could surmise that our evil mother succeeded in stripping us of any and all individuality! (Just kidding, Mom.)

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