Ready, Set…

Friday: Tods snakeskin loafers

So despite my faith in the tryptophan shopping blocker theory, I ended up undermining myself by doing some quick online shopping at Saks.com before I had any turkey yesterday. I ordered a couple of Tory tops, a Prada belt, and some Marc by Marc Jacobs jeans.

Can I just make a quick aside here to say how great it is that e-commerce means never having to say you’re bored? After-Christmas and After-Thanksgiving (let’s call them shopping holidays, observed) can come early. Whooo hoo! I remember the dark days of my childhood when Sundays — never mind major holidays — were non-shopping days. Then once the blue laws were lifted there were some stores open in the afternoon (so ostensibly you could go to church before you went to worship at the garish temple of consumerism, a.k.a. the mall). Oh you lucky children of today, you will never know the horrors of not being able to buy anything at any time on any day.

But back to the present. Realizing it’s going to be a battle royal today, I took half an Ambien and dozed off with visions of Saks in my head…

600 hours, sharp: Reveille. Quick stretching exercises. First dose of caffeine. (You think that’s bad? My sister got up at 4 to go to Fry’s by 5, so her husband could get his stuff and then she could take the car and get on her way to Saks by 7:15. Precision, ladies!)
615 hours to 645 hours: Shower. Dress in tank top and jeans and comfy Tods loafers for maximum ease of trying on clothes. Tie hair into sleek ponytail so no one gets hurt.
645 to 700: Get in car and brave pre-dawn traffic. (Hmm. What traffic? Guess everyone’s already at the mall…)
700 to 745: Quick stop in Sears — yes, Sears! — to pick up a $79 gold link chain for a jewelry project.
745 to 800: Look longingly at the salespeople inside Saks until they finally relent and let us in. Another woman there told us she drove by Wal-Mart and people were parking on the grass. Not so much a problem here. We got a plum parking space.
800 to 830: I’m all ready for the mass hysteria… and all I see are a few other shoppers — browsers, really, by the looks of it. No biting or hair-pulling necessary. No wait at the register either! What on earth is going on? I am, after all, in the mall mecca of Dallas. How can this be? I’m completely perplexed.
830 to 900: Guess I’ve been spoiled by the Saks in New York, because all there is for me to do here is get price adjustments on some M Missoni stuff I’d bought before. There’s no need to go to Neiman’s — I stopped by on Wednesday and nothing caught my fancy. The designer merch isn’t going on sale until next week anyway.

Wow, 9 a.m. and I’m already heading home, ready for a nap. Black Friday? Bah. What a turkey!

This entry was posted on Friday, November 25th, 2005 at 3:58 pm and is filed under Shopping. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.